Hobrazia

[Kubrick]

Funeral of Late Dictator to Be Most Expensive in History, Says Leaked Memo
22 October 5690



With no formal successor the passing of authoritarian president Vasil Khimshiashvili last week left a short moment of doubt on who would take charge. Against expectations it was vice-president Tajaddin Javadzadeh who emerged into the spotlight to announce he would be taking on the role of acting president until a definitive candidate could be sworn in as the new president. Javadzadeh is a controversial figure in Hobrazia, being one of the few of the Zargundian minority to be trusted by the late dictator. A year after his appointment as vice-president his son was killed in an ambush by ethnic Deltarian rebels, he has been a strong proponent of heavy measures in Adelthe Kheku ever since. In the past he was painted as a bureaucrat without ambitions, fiercely loyal to the Khimshiashvili regime, though his calculated moves after the passing of the president may prove this impression to be wrong.

The last week the acting president has been appearing with Rostom Khimshiashvili at official outings. Rostom is the third son of the late dictator and holds no official job in the regime. In the past he was a senior editor at News of the Day, the conservative news outlet owned by the family, but was removed from this position after eight months. There were whispers about sexual misconduct, though other rumours suggested gross incompetence as the reason. Other endeavours included a casino (bankrupt after two years), a short stint as board member at Hobrazia's only theme park (resigned after four months), liaison to the ambassador in Fort William (sent back home after two weeks), and managing director at the K'unti automobile factory. The last job he held the longest, for 4.5 years, before a government bailout from his father had to save the once thriving car brand. After the last event he was fully cast aside by his father, and lived the life of a bachelor playboy in one of the larger family apartments in the capital.

Per the constitution it is the vice-president who must prepare the funeral service of a president that dies in office. With this task Javadzadeh declared he would need unlimited resources to honour the greatest president in Hobrazia's history, which was then an excuse for the other high-ranking members in government to vote him in. Rumours suggest that Khimshiashvili family members tried to stop the measure, with Minister of Sports Danieli Khimshiashvili being one of the loudest opponents. Nonetheless, they were outvoted. A part of this success has been attributed to Javadzadeh's close association with Rostom, who is seen as a malleable Khimshiashvili by the senior party members that wish to keep their jobs and influence.

It is hard to truly doubt the loyalty of the upper yes-men, as a leaked memo has revealed that the funeral of Vasil Khimshiashvili, which will be held on 28 October, is to be the most expensive in the history of the nation. Approximately 10,000 soldiers have been drummed up to the capital to stand vigil in dress uniforms, a gold-plated statue of the late dictator will be revealed as fast as possible, the service will be able to host approximately 30,000 people with screens across the city. Furthermore, the mandatory mourning period will be at least seven days. Vigil sessions are organised across the nation and no expense is spared on the special parade to honour the fallen president. The memo also revealed that Rostom Khimshiashvili will take centre-stage, right next to vice-president Javadzadeh, during the televised funeral service. An interesting note here is that the same memo also clarifies that 'under no circumstance' the third-born son may be allowed to speech.



დემოს ხმაც (Demos Khmats, "Voice of the People") is an online news organization run by members of the anti-Khimshiashvili Hobrazian diaspora.