Kalistan

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Her Imperial Majesty's Trade Secretary faces Questions
Boone: "We have no business in Kundrati. Period."
Kaliburg, Grand Duchy of Ananto
January 17, 5657


Trade Minister Melanie Boone answers questions in the National Assembly

Her Imperial Majesty's Minister for Trade and Industry, Ms. Melanie Boone was called to confirm that no Kalistani nationals had anything to do with the complete financial collapse in Kundrati. Ms. Boone not only confirmed it but went further.

"Well, that would be illegal, wouldn't it?" asked Ms. Boone, rhetorically. "I can assure you that no Kalistani money has been transfered on any level to Kundrati, and Kalistani Nationals had nothing to do with the utter collapse of the Kundrati economy. Directly."

Following the denial, several Liberal Deputies cried foul and demanded an explanation. "Well, to my Liberal Colleagues, what I mean is, we have all seen the papers, and we now know of this... secret bet... that many of your friends in the Business Community made, which cost them a fairly tidy sum of money. But anyone with a modicum of education in macroeconomics would not have bet Over. There are so many fundamental problems with Kundrati: They have been spending like drunken fascists since the end of the war, not building anything that would be capable of providing any sort of long term or sustainable financial health for the nation.

"Instead they have squandered tens of billions in foreign Direct Investment on mining, and rebuilding the military infrastructure. No money for health, no money for schools, no money for sustainable agriculture or sustainable power, no money for social programs of any kind. No money even for Government or Administrative reform. But lots of money for military spending, lots of money for raw uranium, and a handful of miserable jobs for a small percentage of the population, with most of the benefits going to the corrupt Government staff at the top." Boone added, "Kalistan couldn't have done anything more for them to push their economy into free fall than they did for themselves. We had no leverage in the Kundrati economy, let alone enough to affect their markets in any way. But that won't stop them from lying about it. Because that's what they do."

Asked bluntly, "Did Kalistan manipulate global Markets to negatively affect the Kundrati economy, as they insist," Ms. Boone said flatly, "No. There is no way our investors could have. Let me say this clearly. We have no business in Kundrati. Period. And if they did, I wouldn't know about it anyway because it wouldn't be legal. Kundrati is such a tiny concern in this world, not even worthy enough to dedicate an intern in our Ministry to them. But even a liberal knows how to mitigate risk, and with Kundrati, the risk always outweighs any benefit. The days where there was anything even worth taking the time to research for investment in Kundrati have been over for decades. The name 'Kundrati' is synonymous with deceit, degeneracy and aberrance world wide. Nothing they say or do can be trusted." The minister's words were greeted with nods of agreement and shouts of "Hear Hear" by other Institutional Deputies.

"Look," said Ms. Boone. "Both the Chancellor and Her Imperial Majesty have already interrogated me extensively on this topic, and they will confirm what I have said to you should you feel they are eligible for a similar interrogation. Kalistan had no direct role in Kundrati's demise, and what indirect role we played involves complying with Kalistani Trade Law of Non Association with Enemy Aliens. That and betting informally against their success here in Kalistan.

"But if our Liberal Friends here are so convinced, let them get the evidence of Kalistani meddling from the Kundratis, who they seem to be so enamored with. Please do get the Evidence. The Legion... excuse me, 'The Father Front' says they have incontrovertible evidence. Its time to put up or shut up. And nobody in this Government, not me, not the Chancellor, not the Foreign Minister, not the Empress herself thinks they can put anything up. So the Kundratis should now what they should have done 90 years ago."

Institutional Deputies raised a rousing ovation for the Trade Minister, while Liberals remained seated with sour looks on their face. After the Session was adjourned for the day, The Republic caught up with Liberal Deputy Vanessa Delgado of Lucid. "Yeah, she gave all the right answers," said Deputy Delgado. "But I have a real hard believing that a country can be that incompetent with their economy. They were a capitalist economy. The Market operates itself as anyone knows. If Ms. Boone expects us to believe that the Kundrati Economy collapsed on its own, what's the next thing she expects us to believe? That the Free Market doesn't self regulate? The Kundrati Government would have actually TRIED to mess up that bad, and worked extra hard to do it. And we all know that the Legion can't feed their people by themselves, let alone fully mitigate the fundamental philosophical principles of the free market and capitalism without help from foreign agents."

So far Kundrati has not provided any evidence of Kalistani involvement except some official State propaganda uttered by a nameless, faceless Kundrati politician. "These are just baseless accusations," said Kaliburg Institutional Deputy Marian Brenner. "Same nonsense we have come to expect from Kundrati. Besides the words of the Trade Minister, we have no further comment."

@TheRepublic